can't sleep...

It's about to turn 2am and I can't sleep. It's not because I was out late or doing anything of significance. It's just that every time I'm not diverting my attention with a menial task or some mind dulling activity I get all riled up about work. I'm not sure why I can't just leave work and the situations that occur there in the office. 98% of the time at home I don't think about work at all once I've left the building. Maybe it's because I'm here and can't really unwind since everything in my day is a consequence of work. Maybe I've just been way to negative lately and lost my ability to just let things go. Maybe I just need a kindred spirit. Regardless I have a flight booked on Friday. I asked my boss for the day off. He said I have to ask the customer since they are concerned with lack of support. What really gets me is that I really do nothing, every day. I could teach an 8 year old to cover for me. Perhaps that's is what is really bothering me. That or the fact that these Germans take disgusting amounts of time off and no one complains. My boss took 2 weeks off came back with a tan etc. and there were no complaints. The customer took 3 weeks off to hang out on the beach. My colleague took 3 weeks off to coincide with job 1, which is a big deal in regards to the worst possible time to take a vacation in the automotive industry. He said I could call him if I had any questions and promptly turned all of his cell phones off (3), stopped responding to his personal email account, and won't answer his house phone, nor return messages. I can't really blame him, but if you say call if you have questions then I would expect that you'd have an open line of communication. Last week I asked my direct counterpart at the customer if he'd be able to cover for me, his response, not a problem. Today, 'who's going to cover for you? What if there is an issue? I don't think that it is such a good idea.' WTF? Everyone here is so F'ing lazy and inconsiderate. What happens when we have a German colleague come to the states? We take them out, they get to use their ridiculous amounts of vacation time, etc. I've taken 1 day off in 2 months. Talking with other colleagues that have come here my experience is not unique. Nobody gives a F about anyone else here. My US colleague is excited that on this visit I'm here and will be able to take her out and have things to do outside of work. Only because I'm here, none of ze German's have any interest in doing things. When I went to Mexico I had invites for every lunch period, every evening. They treat me like a second class citizen and expect me to have a work ethic... which is funny. My company doesn't give two scheisse about its employees and then the heads wonder why performance is terrible. The good news and ray of light on this whole situation: my 'contract' which I read over with the president of the US company, although no one ever signed it and I don't have a copy, states that regardless of what happens here I'm guaranteed a flight home. So if things don't work out this upcoming week and when I don't show up Friday I get fired. Sunday night when I get back from Rome I can pack up all my stuff and go home.

Peace,

-Livonia